Lesson 69: How to Plant Seeds When People Reject the Message
Not everyone will receive the gospel when you share it.
Some people may listen respectfully but make no response.
Others may change the subject.
Some may postpone the matter.
Some may argue.
Some may mock.
Others may become angry because the message confronts their sin, religion, pride, or self-rule.
Rejection can be painful, especially when you care deeply about the person.
You may begin asking:
“Did I say something wrong?”
“Was the conversation wasted?”
“Should I try harder to make the person agree?”
“Should I stop speaking to people about Christ?”
Scripture teaches us to be faithful with the seed and to trust God with the increase.
The Seed Is the Word
Jesus said plainly:
“The sower soweth the word.”
— Mark 4:14, KJV
Planting spiritual seed does not mean speaking only in vague hints and hoping someone somehow understands the gospel.
The seed is the Word.
It includes the truth about:
God;
sin;
Jesus Christ;
His death and resurrection;
repentance;
faith;
and eternal life.
Kindness may prepare a conversation.
A testimony may awaken interest.
A thoughtful question may open the door.
But the seed itself must contain truth from God.
Do not claim that you planted the gospel if Christ and His message were never made known.
Planting, Watering, and Increasing Are Different Works
Paul wrote:
“Who then is Paul, and who is Apollos,
but ministers by whom ye believed,
even as the Lord gave to every man?
I have planted, Apollos watered;
but God gave the increase.
So then neither is he that planteth any thing,
neither he that watereth;
but God that giveth the increase.”
— 1 Corinthians 3:5–7, KJV
Paul planted.
Apollos watered.
God gave the increase.
One person may introduce someone to biblical truth.
Another may answer a later question.
Another may demonstrate the Christian life faithfully.
Another may preach the gospel when the person is finally ready to listen.
God may use several servants over many years.
You are not required to perform every part of the work in one conversation.
God Alone Gives Spiritual Life
A farmer can place seed into the soil.
He cannot create life within it.
Likewise, a Christian can:
explain;
reason;
warn;
invite;
answer;
and pray.
He cannot regenerate the heart.
This protects us from two errors.
Pride
“I converted this person through my skill.”
Despair
“This person did not believe, so everything I said was useless.”
Only God gives the increase.
Faithfulness belongs to the messenger.
Spiritual life belongs to God.
Different People Respond Differently to the Same Message
When Paul preached in Athens, Scripture records three responses:
“And when they heard of the resurrection of the dead,
some mocked:
and others said,
We will hear thee again of this matter.”
— Acts 17:32, KJV
Then:
“Howbeit certain men clave unto him, and believed…”
— Acts 17:34, KJV
The same speaker delivered the same central message.
Some mocked.
Some postponed.
Some believed.
A negative response does not automatically prove that the messenger failed.
A positive emotional response does not automatically prove that genuine faith occurred.
The Word exposes the condition of the hearer’s heart.
The Condition of the Soil Matters
In Christ’s parable of the sower, the same seed fell upon different kinds of ground.
Some was immediately taken away.
Some produced a quick but rootless response.
Some was choked by cares, riches, and desires.
Some fell on good ground and produced fruit.
The sower was not commanded to manufacture good soil.
He sowed the Word.
This does not mean the messenger should ignore his own preparation or manner.
It means the hearer’s response cannot be fully controlled by the one speaking.
Rejection Does Not Always Mean the Seed Is Gone
A person may reject the gospel today and remember it years later.
A verse may return to the mind during:
illness;
grief;
failure;
fear;
loneliness;
or a confrontation with death.
A question the person dismissed may continue troubling the conscience.
You may never see the later effect.
Do not assume that visible rejection means the truth vanished.
At the same time, do not claim that hidden conversion is occurring when there is no evidence.
Leave the result honestly with God.
God’s Word Accomplishes His Purpose
God said through Isaiah:
“For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven,
and returneth not thither,
but watereth the earth,
and maketh it bring forth and bud,
that it may give seed to the sower,
and bread to the eater:
So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth:
it shall not return unto me void,
but it shall accomplish that which I please,
and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.”
— Isaiah 55:10–11, KJV
This promise does not mean every person who hears one verse will be saved.
God’s Word may:
convict;
expose;
warn;
harden a person who continues resisting;
bring comfort;
produce repentance;
or stand as a witness.
The Word fulfils God’s purpose.
We should never use this passage to promise a result God has not revealed.
We may use it to trust that faithfully spoken Scripture is never outside God’s knowledge or authority.
Do Not Measure Faithfulness Only by Immediate Results
Modern thinking often measures success through visible numbers:
How many responded?
How many prayed?
How many attended?
How many clicked?
How many agreed?
Numbers may provide useful information, but they do not reveal everything God is doing.
Noah preached righteousness in a corrupt generation, yet few entered the ark.
Jeremiah spoke God’s Word through years of resistance.
Jesus Himself was rejected by many who heard Him directly.
Faithfulness is not identical to immediate popularity.
Jesus Did Not Change Truth to Prevent Departure
After Jesus gave teaching that many found difficult, Scripture says:
“From that time many of his disciples went back,
and walked no more with him.”
— John 6:66, KJV
Jesus did not run after them and replace truth with a more acceptable message.
He turned to the twelve and asked whether they would also leave.
Peter answered:
“Lord, to whom shall we go?
thou hast the words of eternal life.”
— John 6:68, KJV
Compassion does not require changing the message so that no one rejects it.
Jesus possesses the words of eternal life.
The messenger must not remove difficult truth to preserve approval.
Do Not Make the Message Needlessly Offensive
The gospel will offend human pride because it declares that:
all have sinned;
human works cannot save;
Jesus Christ alone is Lord and Saviour;
and people must repent.
That offense belongs to the message.
The messenger should not add unnecessary offense through:
insults;
mockery;
arrogance;
poor listening;
careless accusations;
or an argumentative spirit.
If someone rejects the gospel, let him reject the truth—not needless harshness added by you.
Examine Yourself After Rejection
When a conversation goes badly, ask honest questions:
“Did I explain the gospel accurately?”
“Did I listen?”
“Did I answer the actual question?”
“Was my tone respectful?”
“Did I speak too much without allowing response?”
“Did I pressure the person?”
“Did my conduct contradict the message?”
“Was I more interested in winning than helping?”
This examination is not false guilt.
It is teachability.
If you spoke carelessly, learn and apologize where necessary.
If you spoke faithfully and the person rejected the truth, do not accept responsibility that belongs to the hearer.
Do Not Take Every Rejection as a Personal Insult
The person may not be rejecting your personality.
He may be rejecting:
God’s authority;
the demand to repent;
the uniqueness of Christ;
or the reality of judgment.
Jesus told His appointed messengers:
“He that heareth you heareth me;
and he that despiseth you despiseth me;
and he that despiseth me despiseth him that sent me.”
— Luke 10:16, KJV
This was spoken in a particular commission, but the principle warns us that rejection of faithful biblical truth reaches beyond the human messenger.
Do not make yourself the center of the event.
The central issue is the person’s response to Christ.
Do Not Use “They Rejected Jesus” to Excuse Bad Conduct
The previous truth can be misused.
A person may speak cruelly, misrepresent Scripture, refuse to listen, and then say:
“They are not rejecting me. They are rejecting Jesus.”
Perhaps they are also reacting to the messenger’s sin.
We must distinguish rejection of truth from a reasonable response to our wrongdoing.
Humility asks:
“Was Christ accurately represented?”
Do Not Argue Until the Person Surrenders
The goal of evangelism is not to exhaust someone until he stops resisting.
A person may say:
“I do not want to continue this conversation.”
Respecting that request is not denying the gospel.
You may answer:
“I respect your decision. I care about you, and I am willing to talk again if you ever want to.”
Pressure can produce an outward statement without inward faith.
Only God can bring genuine repentance.
Do Not Force a Prayer
After someone rejects or hesitates, the Christian may become desperate to secure a result.
He may say:
“Just repeat this prayer after me.”
A person can repeat every word without understanding, repentance, or faith.
Prayer may express genuine trust in Christ.
It is not a device for overcoming someone’s refusal.
Do not manufacture a decision so that you can feel successful.
Distinguish Questions From Resistance
A person who asks difficult questions is not necessarily rejecting the gospel.
He may be:
thinking;
testing whether the message is true;
or trying to understand language unfamiliar to him.
Listen carefully.
Answer what you can.
Admit what you do not know.
Do not label every question unbelief merely because it slows the conversation.
At the same time, recognize when questions become a method of endless avoidance.
Recognize Postponement
Some people do not mock.
They say:
“I will think about it later.”
“I am not ready.”
“Maybe when I am older.”
Postponement is still a response.
Paul’s hearers said:
“We will hear thee again of this matter.”
Some may genuinely return.
Others use delay to avoid repentance.
You may say calmly:
“I respect that you want to think. Please remember that none of us controls how much time we have. Read the Scriptures for yourself, and do not delay merely because the truth is uncomfortable.”
Then leave the matter without manipulation.
Recognize Mockery
Mockery may tempt you to retaliate.
Do not trade insult for insult.
You may answer one honest question.
You may correct one false statement.
But you are not required to remain in a conversation whose only purpose is ridicule.
The gospel is precious.
The hearer is responsible.
Stepping away can be wiser than allowing holy truth to become material for continual mockery.
Know When to Move On
Jesus told His disciples concerning towns that refused their message:
“And whosoever shall not receive you, nor hear your words,
when ye depart out of that house or city,
shake off the dust of your feet.”
— Matthew 10:14, KJV
This instruction belonged to a particular missionary commission, but it establishes a continuing principle:
The messenger does not have to remain indefinitely where the message is firmly and repeatedly refused.
Moving on is not always giving up.
It may allow you to speak to someone willing to hear.
Moving On Is Not Pronouncing Final Judgment
You do not know whether the person will repent later.
Do not step away while saying:
“God is finished with you.”
“You will never be saved.”
You do not possess that knowledge.
You may simply recognize:
“This conversation is no longer fruitful.”
“I need to respect the boundary.”
“I will remain willing to speak again if the person becomes open.”
Leave final judgment with God.
Paul Continued Nearby
When some in Corinth opposed Paul’s preaching, he declared his responsibility and moved his teaching activity.
Scripture then records:
“And he departed thence,
and entered into a certain man’s house, named Justus,
one that worshipped God,
whose house joined hard to the synagogue.
And Crispus, the chief ruler of the synagogue,
believed on the Lord with all his house…”
— Acts 18:7–8, KJV
Rejection in one setting did not end Paul’s witness.
He continued nearby.
Someone else believed.
Do not allow one person’s refusal to silence every future conversation.
Leave a Clear Seed
When a conversation ends, consider what truth the person will remember.
Perhaps leave:
a verse;
a short gospel explanation;
a thoughtful question;
a copy of John’s Gospel;
a trustworthy article;
or an invitation to continue later.
The seed should be understandable.
Do not overwhelm the person with twenty links, several books, and hours of material.
One clear truth may be more useful than a flood of information.
A Question Can Remain After the Conversation
A thoughtful question may continue working in the mind.
Examples include:
“What are you trusting to make you right with God?”
“Who do you believe Jesus Christ truly is?”
“If salvation must be earned, how would you ever know you had done enough?”
“If Jesus rose from the dead, what would that require from you?”
Do not use questions as traps.
Use them to help the person examine his own beliefs.
Scripture Can Remain After Your Words Are Forgotten
Your explanation may not be remembered precisely.
God’s Word carries authority beyond your personality.
You may leave a passage such as:
John 3;
Luke 15;
Isaiah 53;
Romans 3;
1 Corinthians 15;
or another appropriate portion.
Invite the person to read it directly.
Say:
“You do not have to take my word for it. Please read what Scripture says about Jesus Christ.”
Preserve the Relationship When Possible
Rejection of the message does not always require ending the relationship.
You may continue being:
a faithful relative;
honest coworker;
helpful neighbor;
or caring friend.
Do not punish the person socially because he did not respond as you hoped.
Continue showing genuine kindness without pretending the spiritual difference does not matter.
A continuing relationship may provide later opportunities.
Do Not Maintain Unsafe Access Merely to Witness
Some relationships are dangerous.
A person may be abusive, threatening, manipulative, or persistently destructive.
Planting gospel seed does not require remaining within harm.
You may speak truth and establish strong boundaries.
You may pray from a distance.
You may involve appropriate authorities.
Concern for the soul does not cancel safety or justice.
Respect Clear Boundaries
If someone says:
“Please do not send me more religious messages,”
respect that request.
You may continue praying privately.
You may answer if the person later asks.
Repeatedly crossing an explicit boundary is not necessarily bold evangelism.
It may harden the person further and damage trust.
God does not require harassment.
Family Rejection Requires Patience
Family members may resist because they:
remember your past;
feel judged;
believe they already understand Christianity;
or fear that the relationship is changing.
Do not respond by preaching at every gathering.
Live consistently.
Apologize for real failures.
Answer questions when they arise.
Make sure your concern is visible as love rather than constant pressure.
You may need patience over many years.
Lesson 70 will address the longer burden more fully.
Online Rejection Can Become Endless
Online discussions often encourage rapid anger and public performance.
A person may continue replying only because others are watching.
Ask:
“Is this conversation helping anyone understand?”
“Am I answering sincerely or trying to defeat someone publicly?”
“Has the exchange become repetitive?”
You may state the truth once or twice and then stop.
Silence after a clear answer is not necessarily defeat.
Do Not Chase Every Mocking Comment
Public Christian content may attract ridicule.
You are not obligated to answer every comment.
Respond where:
a sincere question exists;
a false claim needs brief correction;
or silent readers may benefit.
Ignore responses designed only to provoke.
Your time belongs to God.
Do not spend hours arguing with one mocker while neglecting people willing to listen.
Do Not Become Bitter
Rejection may wound pride.
You cared.
You prepared.
You hoped for a different response.
Then the person laughed or dismissed you.
Bitterness says:
“Fine. I no longer care what happens to you.”
That response reveals that self may have been more involved than we realized.
Bring the pain to God.
Forgive personal insult.
Continue desiring the person’s salvation.
You may need to step back.
Do not allow hatred to replace concern.
Do Not Change the Gospel to Gain Acceptance
Rejection may tempt a Christian to remove:
sin;
repentance;
judgment;
the cross;
the lordship of Christ;
or His exclusivity.
The message becomes easier to accept because it no longer says what God says.
That is not successful evangelism.
Paul wrote:
“But as we were allowed of God to be put in trust with the gospel,
even so we speak;
not as pleasing men,
but God, which trieth our hearts.”
— 1 Thessalonians 2:4, KJV
We are entrusted with the gospel.
We are not authorized to redesign it.
Do Not Add Offense to Prove Courage
The opposite temptation is to make the presentation unnecessarily severe.
A believer may think:
“If people reject me, that proves I was bold.”
Rejection alone does not prove faithfulness.
False teaching can be rejected.
Pride can be rejected.
Cruelty can be rejected.
Biblical courage speaks the full truth with a Christlike spirit.
Another Believer May Water the Seed
You may never be the person who sees the result.
Someone else may later explain the same truth more clearly.
The hearer may be more prepared.
His circumstances may have changed.
Do not become jealous if someone believes after another Christian speaks.
The goal was never your personal credit.
Paul planted.
Apollos watered.
God gave the increase.
Rejoice whenever Christ is truly received.
You May Be Watering Seed Someone Else Planted
You also may enter a work already in progress.
A person’s parent may have prayed for years.
A teacher may have given Scripture.
A friend may have shared the gospel.
You may hear the person ask a question and assume your conversation began everything.
Be humble.
God may have been using many people long before you arrived.
Continue Sowing Wisely
Ecclesiastes says:
“In the morning sow thy seed,
and in the evening withhold not thine hand:
for thou knowest not whether shall prosper,
either this or that,
or whether they both shall be alike good.”
— Ecclesiastes 11:6, KJV
The verse concerns faithful labor under uncertainty, and the principle applies wisely to gospel work.
We do not know which conversation God may use.
Continue sowing.
Do not let one rejection determine the value of every future opportunity.
Faithfulness Is Not Failure
You may explain the gospel accurately, speak with compassion, answer honestly, pray faithfully, and still hear:
“No.”
That answer matters.
The person remains responsible before God.
But your faithful witness was not failure.
Failure would be:
changing the gospel;
lying about results;
manipulating a response;
speaking through hatred;
or refusing to obey because you feared rejection.
Plant the seed faithfully.
Leave the increase to God.
A Practical Response-to-Rejection Pattern
1. Listen to the Response
Determine whether the person is confused, postponing, mocking, or firmly refusing.
2. Examine Your Witness
Correct any real error in message, timing, tone, or conduct.
3. Clarify One Essential Truth
Do not repeat the entire presentation unnecessarily.
4. Refuse Argument and Pressure
You cannot force repentance.
5. Leave a Clear Seed
Offer one Scripture, question, resource, or concise gospel statement.
6. Respect the Person’s Boundary
Do not turn witness into harassment.
7. Preserve the Relationship When Wise and Safe
Continue demonstrating genuine concern.
8. Pray
Ask God to use the truth and send other faithful witnesses.
9. Continue Speaking to Others
One rejection must not silence you.
10. Trust God With the Increase
Do not take credit or carry responsibility that belongs to Him.
A Rejection Examination
The person or situation was:
The response I received was:
Mockery / Postponement / Argument / Silence / Clear refusal / Other
The gospel truth I communicated was:
What I may need to improve is:
The clear seed I can leave is:
The boundary I should respect is:
How I can continue praying is:
The next person or opportunity I should not neglect is:
Discipleship Questions
- What is the difference between planting, watering, and the increase that only God gives?
- Why does rejection not automatically prove that the messenger failed?
- How can a Christian examine his own conduct without accepting false responsibility for another person’s unbelief?
- When may it be wise to end a gospel conversation and move on?
- What clear seed of Scripture or gospel truth can you leave with someone who is not presently willing to believe?
Closing Exhortation
Plant the seed when people reject the message.
Do not force it into the soil.
Do not change it to make it more acceptable.
Do not add cruelty to make yourself appear bold.
Do not argue until the person surrenders.
Do not turn mockery into personal hatred.
Do not declare that a living person can never repent.
Speak the Word.
Answer honestly.
Leave a clear truth.
Respect boundaries.
Preserve the relationship where wise.
Continue praying.
Then move toward the next faithful opportunity.
You may plant.
Another may water.
Only God gives the increase.
A Prayer After Rejection
Father,
Thank You for entrusting the gospel of Jesus Christ to Your people.
You know the person who rejected, postponed, ignored, or mocked the message.
Examine my heart and conduct.
Show me if I spoke inaccurately, proudly, carelessly, harshly, or without listening.
Help me correct what was wrong without carrying guilt that does not belong to me.
Keep me from anger, bitterness, embarrassment, and the desire to force a response.
Protect me from changing the gospel to gain approval.
Also protect me from adding needless offense in the name of boldness.
Let the truth that was spoken remain in the person’s mind.
Bring Scripture back to remembrance.
Send other faithful believers to water what was planted.
Use circumstances, conscience, and Your Word to reveal Jesus Christ.
Give the person repentance and faith.
Help me respect any boundary that has been clearly expressed.
Show me whether to continue the relationship, speak again later, or move on.
Do not let one rejection silence my future witness.
Remind me that I am a servant.
I may plant or water, but You alone give the increase.
In Jesus’ name, amen.
Next Step
Choose one person who has rejected or avoided a gospel conversation.
The person is:
What was clearly communicated is:
What may still be misunderstood is:
The one Scripture, question, or resource I can leave is:
The boundary I must respect is:
How I will continue praying is:
The next faithful opportunity I will not avoid is:
Do not restart the entire argument.
Leave one clear seed.
Treat the person with genuine respect.
Then trust God and continue sowing elsewhere.
Previous Lesson: Lesson 68 — How to Be a Light in a Dark World
Next Lesson: Lesson 70 — How to Stay Burdened for Souls Without Becoming Discouraged